


You saved me.

by Birdy07



Series: Without you (I'm just a sad song) [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Bittersweet, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gay Logic | Logan Sanders, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Insecure Logic | Logan Sanders, Insomnia, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, M/M, Nightmares, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:41:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24316714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Birdy07/pseuds/Birdy07
Summary: Nightmares, the sickening reminder that Logan can't help the way Patton needs. He can't be a comfort in the rain, he can't take all the pain away, and he can't understand why. Maybe if they're lucky they can save each other.Sequel to: stand in the rain. But can be read by itself.
Relationships: Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: Without you (I'm just a sad song) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1755484
Kudos: 34





	You saved me.

**Author's Note:**

> I had five chapters of I keep.bleeding finished but they got erased so I wrote this instead.

Patton let out a soft whine and shivered in his sleep, this was concerning to Logan who was laying awake next to him for reasons He would never share. He was not watching him sleep, that would be creepy. He silently rolled over and ran a hand through the blonde curls of the other man, Patton whimpered again louder this time. Logan now engulfed with concern, pulled himself away from the person of his affection, got out of the bed they shared. 

He paced back and fourth for a moment debating, if he woke Patton up he could be angry, but if he didn't, Patton could suffer in a nightmare for the whole night. Patton couldn't suffer, the idea felt wrong in Logan's heart, like the sound of a rattlesnakes shake, a warning of worse danger. He hated the idea that he couldn't help Patton.

'Of course you can, just wake him up you idiot.' A voice screeched at him, it made a valid enough point so Logan obliged. 'even I can figure out that, why can't you? Your such a failure.' He shook off the last part and put his hand to his... Boyfriend's?... Shoulder shaking him slightly. "Patton...." Another whine and a feeling in Logan's gut twisted it's way to the surface, a sickening reminder that he really wasn't the best person to help his love. He couldn't even understand his own fears, how could he help Patton?

" Lo..an. No, ple-ease. Don't... Y-you... No. " the whimpering became words and Logan heard the nickname that dripped from Patton's mouth like rain from the sky, beautiful and life bringing. But in this context it shoved a knife into his stomach and he felt he might throw up, he was trying harder to be in touch with his emotions after all. "Don't leave m-eee pleas-e." He was scared Logan would leave? But Logan wasn't going anywhere. Ever. Patton was everything Logan needed and wanted and loved, he owned his heart.

"Patton, love. It's just a bad dream, I'm right here. Always ." He shook softly one more time, Patton shot up suddenly bumping their foreheads together. Hard. They would have matching bruises tomorrow.

"L-lo-gan!" the shorter launched himself into Logan's arms, resting his head in the crook of the taller's neck. The usually happy man wasn't quite crying, but his body racked with sobs he refused to set free. "You can't leave me here! Please don't leave me!!" He screamed and begged and Logan began to cry because if Patton was this upset then Logan really bad failed, Patton couldn't be upset that was wrong it was his fault too the begging for him to stay made that clear. 

"I'm never leaving Pat, no matter how incorrigible your puns can be." He received a broken off laugh from his love, he was doing better just keep making him laugh. 'Don't let him be upset. Fix it.' He heard someone yell only to find he had been the one to yell.

Patton looked at him with wet and tired eyes, he put a hand to Logan's face and whispered, "fix what?" It was such an innocent question, so why did it push the knife deeper. Why did logans breath leave him the second Patton uttered the seemingly simple statement.

"It hurts." He whispered pulling Patton tighter in the hug, " everytime I see that your upset. It burns my... Chest and stomach, and I feel... Nauseous when your upset. " he emphasized the feel so Patton would know he was trying. 'What are you doing, this isn't supposed to be about you! Selfish. He hates you.' He had to ignore the voice, share. Repression was bad, he learned that a long time ago, that didn't make it any easier.

"Oh Lo, sometimes it has to hurt." Patton smiled and Logan brushed the tears off his face running the other hand through his hair, diligently working to reassure Patton that he wasn't leaving anytime soon. with equal vigor Patton was attempting to get Logan to understand. "Kiddo, hurting is a part of healing. You can't have one without the other , or you wouldn't need healed." He chuckled. Logan put his lips to the top of the blonde hair and kissed it.

Patton didn't understand, that was okay. Logan hadn't told him about his dad, what he did , the scars he left behind. But even without the past, they had the present. Every single moment with each other healed, and hurt. Every moment Logan loved, he learned. Every moment with Patton was, the opposite of flawless. The weren't puzzle pieces shoved together as the perfect match, they were a child's glued back together picture frame. Messy but cherished. Their story was a coffee stained eulogistical book, ruined but worth the work to read. 

But, what was really incredible was that of everybody in the entire world, so many people passing by each other without ever meeting, they found each other in a hopeless place. In such a huge universe in which humans were so small. when he was with Patton he felt like he could finally breath, like for once he didn't have to pretend to be okay. Patton made him feel anything but infinitesimal.

"I love you, and promise I will never leave if you ever ask me to stay." Logan whispered into Patton's hair.

" I love you, and promise to never let you not feel anything ever again. " he whispered in reply, and the buzzing in Logan's chest stopped the knife didn't move. It wasn't gone but it didn't hurt near as bad as before.

"You saved me."

" You saved me. "


End file.
